Holidays... Oh Joy!

hey so the thing thats on my mind most now is the upcoming holidays, which is like an excuse for everyone to pig out for two weeks, then make a new years resolution to never touch junk food again and go to the gym more and eat better right? sounds like my normal december/january. but the major problem is that i never stay on this for more than a month. i eat all the left overs, and then dont exercise. so this year, im going to try not to eat alot in the first place, so i dont fall into this horrible circle and gian weight after christmas, because then boxing day is a horrible experience! (for anyone that doesnt know, boxing day is december 26 in canada when all the stores have massive sales and lots of people shop, including me, so i would like to buy some new, my size clothes then!) this year, i want to change that. i have decided that ill just exersize more, then i wont need to eat less, just normal, does that make sense? if anyone has any tips of encouragement, id really apreciate them! but anyways, i guess thats all thats on my mind. for now. i love you all and your amazing! keep it up lovelys *huggs and kisses to all*
juliette <3

embarressed...

ok, so as you may have noticed i have not posted in a while . . . im soo embarrassed about it because it has been bugging me all week . . . i am ashamed to have not posted because . . . i guess ill just get it out. . . i have gained two pounds.

wow im glad thats out. now i am back to my fat 107 self, and i have been sick for the past 3 weeks. i think theirs a saying, starve the temperature, feed the cold??? yeah. i had a cold. and it has been thanksgiving. so, as you can imagine, i feel horrible.

but, on the brightside, me and my boyfriend are going great, everyone tells me im skinny, and none of my friends are noticing my no eating!!! hoorah!!! also my mom is on this diet, so we have acai in the fridge and she eats like a rabbit, so its all good!!! anyone know the affects of acai??? gonna google, but have had no time all week.

theirs a dance coming up at school (yes, i am that lame) and im thinking of going. will need to look hot, so will hopefully starve this next few weeks. also, i fit into my skinny jeans!!! and by skinny jeans i do not mean style, but the 00 jeans i have been saving up for a special occasion. . .mabey ill wear those to the dance. . .anyways, they fit, are tight but i can do them up!!! exctatic!!!

also, it snowed yesterday, so winter is here and i am so excited, it is my favourite time of year (so its a good thing i live in canada) and i think thats really all on my mind right now. im so releived i got that out and now i dont feel so guilty!

hugs and kisses and wishes!

Help!

Weight : 105
Goal : 90

1 pounds off! hoorah!!!
but, as i thought, all my friends are noticing that i don't eat at lunch. it bugs me cause they all make a huge deal out of it. so im trying to come up with some "safe foods" you can bring to school that are relativly normal. heres what i have so far:

orange slices
salad with low-fat dressing
veggies with dipp
baked chips
diet coke and soda
apple crackers (amazingly good)
fruit smoothies (with acai)
sugar free jello
90-100 calorie packs (chips, crackers)
gum
cucumber salad
soups

so thats all ive got so far, if anyone wants to help me out on this, i need foods that are normal that everyone eats and no one will think is weird.
got any ideas???

xoxo

Diet Plan...

weight : 106
goal : 90
hoorah! 1 pound gone, 14 more to go

here is my new diet plan :

monday 400
tuesday 500
wednesday 500
thursday 300
friday 400
saturday 600
sunday 700

. . . now i know it sounds like high numbers, but after two weeks ill switch it to this

monday 300
tuesday 400
wednesday 400
thursday 200
friday 300
saturday 600
sunday 700

. . . then ill switch back to the first, then second, and so on . . .

i think its pretty reasonable and do-able. These numbers are only for food, not including exercize though, and i dance on modays for 3 hours, wednesdays for 1 and thursdays for 2, so ill hopefully burn all the calories i eat. wish me luck! be strong!

Random...

current weight : 107
goal weight : 90
im so procrastinating. i have this big project due monday and a test tommorrow. and i have to organize all my binders. but really, its annoying and upsetting to have to keep such a big secret from your family.

why must my entire world revolve around what i eat??? all i can think about is food (bad) and food (good) and i need to focus that attention to my homework so that i can pass my classes. i've never been that good at school, but this year im gonna try really hard. i will make my mom proud and get 85s and 90s.

instead of doing all of this, i am here, feeling worthless and self-consious (all at me and my body, not anyone i know)

haha found great thinspo in my class! these girls i know are sooo skinny, their measerments are like 27-23-31 super petite and i am in almost every class with them, so i get to see them and watch them all the time! but other than that, lifes going pretty good. i mean, i dropped 2 pounds, so i should be happy, right? i am, of course, i just thought it would be more exciteing to see my hard work actually pay off. really i was just kind of dissapointed. 107? really? when my goal is 90? not sooo great.

anyways, off to dance, hope to cleanse my spirit and burn some calories!!!

in the beggining. . .

since i can remember my mom has been saying "i'm fat, i need to lose weight, those clothes would fit if only i was 10 pounds thinner...", so obviously i didn't exactly have the healthiest perception of food and your body. and she has never, ever been proud of me. so, in my determination to be perfect, not only for me, but for her too, i will need:
a grade point average of over 85
a perfectly clean and neat and organized room
a good boyfriend
a job
be the pretties girl in the room
eat all healthy
and be a size and 90 pounds
these have been my goals for about 3 years now, and i have unseccsessfully reached them. wish me luck!